What Does It Mean to Be a Sugar Baby

The male sugar babies of the world — or perhaps I should say the aspiring male sugar babies of the globe — take a major problem: there aren't almost plenty saccharide mamas to go around.

"The sugar mama scene is the nigh underdeveloped of all the dating markets," says Seth Sokoloff, founder of sugar dating site SugarFetch. Merely the saccharide mama shortage is not for lack of need. "At that place are infinitely more guys who would honey to have a sugar mama than there are carbohydrate mamas for them," says Sokoloff, who adds that while carbohydrate mamas might be slightly more common in the lesbian community, saccharide dating platforms are "rife with guys trying to look for the nearly mythical direct sugar mama and then getting themselves scammed by faux accounts."

Evidence of the unmet thirst for sugar mamas has turned up in other corners of the cyberspace as well. Over on Reddit, r/SugarMama is filled with requests from young men seeking female benefactors, about of which seem to get unanswered. Pleas from a "22-year-old white boy just wanting some fun" or an "18-year-quondam male in demand of a carbohydrate mama ASAP" who describes himself as willing to "do anything in substitution for gifts, cash, etc." are still pending response, and the forum itself has been inactive for two years.

When starting his own site, Sokoloff really found himself trying to discourage many an eager young man looking to join the platform in search of a sugar mama. "At that place'due south lots of guys trying to join to find sugar mamas," he tells InsideHook. "I really suggest that they not waste their fourth dimension. It'due south just non very much of a thing however."

That said, carbohydrate mamas do exist — even if they're harder to notice. A rep for SeekingArrangement, one of the largest and well-nigh recognizable sugar dating platforms in the earth, tells InsideHook the site is home to about 500,000 saccharide mamas worldwide. That's compared to 3,500,000 saccharide daddies, mind you. But while female benefactors are obviously dwarfed past their male person counterparts, the numbers prove that saccharide mamas are hardly nonexistent.

"Obviously, people don't talk nigh information technology as much, only it'southward definitely something that is not unheard of," says Rachel Uchitel, a spokeswoman for Seeking. "There are some women who have been successful in their career, who know what they want, and money is non an issue for them, and so they're generous when it comes to supporting their partners." By and large, however, Uchitel says most women still tend to gravitate towards the opposite end of the carbohydrate dating dynamic, fifty-fifty though "there are plenty of women out there who could benefit from having a sugar baby and could beget information technology."

So what's property them back?

According to Uchitel, it all comes downward to gender roles. At the end of the day, many women want to be taken care of in their relationships, even those who don't necessarily need financial support from a partner. "There aren't a lot of women that sign up [to be sugar mamas] considering a lot of women want to be a carbohydrate baby, no matter how old they are," says Uchitel. "I mean, y'all can be a 60-year-old woman — even one who has a lot of money — and still observe that gender office of import."

While no two arrangements are akin, sugar dating tends to reflect and reinforce a patriarchal dynamic that has traditionally been at the heart of heterosexual relationships — and still is to this day, some might argue. Below the romanticized rebrand matrimony has undergone in recent centuries, heterosexual unions can nevertheless trace their roots dorsum to a quid-pro-quo exchange, traditionally of sex for security. Sugar dating, in its most bones form, leans into this dynamic and the respective gender roles it entails. Moreover, the dearth of straight sugar mamas despite heavy need suggests it's really women — non men — who tend to be more than reluctant to flip the gender script.

Norma Desmond, sugar mama of Dusk Boulevard

Paramount

Age might be some other factor contributing to the relative scarcity of saccharide mamas. While traditional gender dynamics make information technology easier for men to step into the role of the provider (and, yes, saccharide daddy) from a immature historic period, Uchitel says women are a lot less likely to become sugar mamas until later in life.

"Men are more successful much younger these days, so sugar daddies can be young. They could be in their thirties, even their twenties," says Uchitel. "Merely I can't imagine a carbohydrate mama who'southward in their twenties. I call back they're non emotionally in that identify until later in life."

Moreover, in that location's the simple reality that many women are not peculiarly interested in dating younger men, even though younger men may well exist interested in dating older women. "I think that a lot of men are attracted to older women who are successful and know themselves," says Uchitel, who says she herself has been approached by many a twenty-something man proclaiming his love for MILFs. Unfortunately for those eager suitors, "I would never date a guy who's 25," says Uchitel. "I couldn't be in the same room."

While she says she might consider "taking care of someone who's 35, 37" if she were to become a sugar mama, she adds that older male sugar babies are probably almost as rare equally immature carbohydrate mamas. "I think a homo could probably only be a sugar baby very young," she says. "I think the ego would kick in as they got equally they got older." And unfortunately for all the aspiring young sugar boys out there, "I'g not about to have some little boy toy that's 25 taking selfies all 24-hour interval," says Uchitel. "I'm just not attracted to that."

According to Sokoloff, however, the future for straight young male daters might not be entirely sugar-costless. "Information technology's just a matter of time before it catches on," he says. "Information technology won't ever be at the level of female sugar babies with male carbohydrate daddies," he adds, "Only I think over time, the marketplace won't exist as lopsided. I think it might be as lopsided as information technology'll ever get right now."

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Source: https://www.insidehook.com/article/sex-and-dating/why-arent-there-more-sugar-mamas

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